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by Lindsay Kyle
Flashes of color. Laughter. Running barefoot through the grass. My brother and I swiped kitchen towels and wrapped them around us, magically transforming them into capes. Old paper towel rings became swords or spyglasses. Swinging on the swing set became battling the crashing waves on an angry sea. We were pirates. The good kind of pirates that saved the distressed damsels and fed the poor with our riches. And as far as we were concerned, we would grow up to be pirates. It didn’t matter what anyone thought of our career aspirations in those sweet days. We were just living out who we believed we were.
Something happens to us not long after the day we realize the kitchen towel is too small to fit around us anymore. Maybe you were in middle school or early high school when the wave swept over you: Someone expects something more from you. Suddenly, your parents sit you down at the dinner table and lecture you on the importance of good grades. Maybe your favorite teacher tells you that she sees the potential of someone great...if only you’d apply yourself. Or the day comes when your best friends are comparing test scores over lunch. Regardless of how it happens, the day comes for all of us when we realize that perhaps what we long to do with our lives...who we long to become...maybe isn’t good enough for this world. At the very least, I sometimes questioned if I was good enough for the people in my world.
When I began to discover the teachings of Jesus, the world of pirates and swing sets--of yellow slides and summer days--changed shaped. Suddenly, I felt this challenge to sacrifice my life in order to find it. The whisper, "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." What did this mean for me? Am I to be a martyr? What about the dreams of my family? What about the dreams of my culture and this world?
In college, the words of Jesus meant that perhaps I should choose to follow a path that would give me the best chance to serve others. And the cost? It would mean the loss of security; I wasn’t going to make a lot of money. Perhaps it would mean the loss of success; I’m pretty sure no one will know my name when the day is done. But once I began to pursue the voice of Jesus in my life, I began to feel sure that I was real. I am alive. Maybe the call on your life is to climb the corporate ladder, making the rat race the race you run for the name of Christ. But maybe it’s living in another country, pouring out your life for the sick, weak, and poor (for theirs is the kingdom of heaven). I don’t know what the scenery looks like for you.
I do believe, though, that the next step in leaving behind the yellow slides is daring to live against the tide. But even Jesus reminded us to count the costs. What do you have to lose?
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